First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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