hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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