I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize