Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
