from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
