There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize