New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
