She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
