the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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