So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
