do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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