Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize