By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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