At least make sure they are 18
Why
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
