Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
