it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
