writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
