She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize
