so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
