I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
