marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Randomize
