toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
