I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
