Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
