I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
