I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Who died my cat blue again?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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