It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
