I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
