Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
