Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
My Higher Power is John Stamos
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
