you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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