have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
