You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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