I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
