I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
