your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
