I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
We need a shit load of segways right now
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
