Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Life is so much better after having sex.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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