i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Go christen that room with your naked body.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
