You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
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