The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I still have a little drunk in my system
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
