O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
