i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Im just a social blackout drinker.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
