I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
