This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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