I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize