I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize