Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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