Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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