need another drink. this is the easiest way
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
